Dealing with (and in lots of cases living with) relationship issues and challenges can have a negative impact on our wellbeing. In addition, other areas of our lives can be affected too, making us anxious and miserable.
Perhaps one or both of you have had previous relationships and children. Bringing families together can sometimes be a challenge and put a strain on relationships.
Types of relationships
When we talk about relationships, we often assume that we are referring to partnerships. However, relationships aren’t just about coupes, partners or significant others. We have relationships with family, extended family, friends, friends of friends, neighbours, work colleagues, people on social media…
How might I feel?
Common signs of relationship issues can include feelings of:
- Insecurity and finding it difficult to trust someone
- Boredom or unfulfilled in a relationship with a partner
- Constantly irritated by someone
- Being undermined by someone
What do other people say about it?
Sometimes, when clients have been let down in the past, current relationships are impacted. For instance, when someone has broken their trust in the past, it can be hard for them not to assume that the same thing will happen again. They talk about living in ‘self-protection’ mode or constantly looking for signs and signals that confirm their worst fears and suspicions. Subsequently, this can prevent them from enjoying a fulfilling relationship.
Some clients say they can feel insecure and struggle to cope when they are not in the company of their partner, needing constant reassurance which can, in some cases, drive their partner away.
Some clients talk about issues with work colleagues, feeling undermined or ‘picked on’ turning the work environment in to a place they dread.
Ways in which relationship issues could affect me…
It would be nice to think that our family is ‘ideal’, ‘close’ and everyone gets on well. In reality, relationships with family can become affected by disagreements, differing views on decisions made, life choices or a breakdown in communication.
The same can apply to friendships. Sometimes, friendships evolve and change. For instance, if we move house or leave a job and the relationship with a ‘close friend’ changes to one that is different, maybe long distance, we can experience feelings of loss, jealousy at being left out, abandoned or we can feel replaced by a friend’s new friend.
Relationships with work colleagues can be a challenge too. We spend a significant amount of time at work and if there are one or two people that affect our day negatively, it can soon get us down.
Self Help, what can I do?
Think about how you would want the relationship to be, consider talking to the person about how you feel.
See our self help guide for ideas
How can we support you?
We have expert relationship counsellors who can support you with relationship challenges. We can offer support with sessions for individuals or couples counselling.